Only memory remains

The minute I clicked on 'publish post' on the earlier blog, I started thinking about my most favourite grandparent, my maternal grandmother. After a note on my granddad, I felt that I wanted to write a note about how I feel about my paati who also recently died. Words started forming in my head as to what would best describe her and I'll try to mention them before they disappear. Like I said in my earlier post, no visit to 'aynavaram' would be complete without thatha's' stories. Well, to my earliest memories, no visit ever didn't begin without my paati's food. The minute we landed home there, we would run down into the house to surprise her of our arrival. And I used to love the expression that she had when she figures out that we're there. After making general enquiries that only paati's are capable of, (why are you so thin was her usual opener after a few initial greetings, which never fail to amaze me as on everybody else's general opinion I was anything but thin!) she would then immediately ask as usual whether we had food, and any response would still be treated as no. So after launching herself into kitchen, she'd guide me to either thatha's room or to meet my uncles and nephews depending on who is immediately free at that moment. Many a times I have woken up my poor thatha on his sunday naps upon the insistence of my paati, little did I realize then that she didn't want anyone at the kitchen when she sets off to put together our favourite part of the visit...... Food!! Her food was very simple, just a sambar with piping hot rice and a few curries finished up with curd or buttermilk. By far, there is one person in the food department who excels in serving more quantity and quality than everyone else put together - that's my Mom! Guests visiting our home usually means atleast a 4 course meal, sometimes more than that!! Anyways, during the time the food is getting ready, she'd settle into a routine of enquiring about how I am, how is the work going, and when will I ever get married, etc. Usually my goofy smile in response to all these questions would leave her shaking her head like I'm some sort of retard, and she would launch into one of her innumerable stories of how this boy, who is of my age, who is her sister's nephew's grandson or something to that effect, and talk about how he has 'settled' in his life.. moral of the story, get married. That last line again would be for me to take a hint and move about to other places in the house, while my sisters get their dose of paati's sisters, brother-in-law's 4th granddaughter who is well off and settled... the same drill, different example. then after helping ourselves generously, we would be hopelessly trapped into her launching attacks on my grooming, my manners, my height, and anything she could think of. Usually, by this time an aunt or an uncle would join us, and we would more often than not go into some tangent conversation that it would be a good couple of hours of idle chat. There would be sometime within the day when she would conspiratorially call me and hand me a 'special' sweet or a gift. Not for anyone else's eyes!! Over my life growing up, I've never seen or felt any other grandparent obsess over grandkids the way she did. She was always an emotional potpourri, happy, angry, sad, cynical, and more of a compulsive 'carer'/provider for anyone who comes to her. Will always miss that attention, that special 'apple of eye' grandkid feeling that only she gave.
Now more than ever I feel grown up, when all that was reminding me of a childhood are being taken away, very quickly becoming only as memory, fear is that this too might eventually fade away in the mad rush of life.