Every now and then some random thought keeps creeping in, festering until it becomes an idea, and finally a story that has to be told. here's one thought that's kept me awake to blog at 4am on Monday.
As I grew, I evolved myself as an identity based on how much I can and cannot do. Folks say that you learn from your mistakes. Sure, but I also learnt a bit from my successes. I've been one type of person at school, another different identity at work and a different person at home. Yes, I know we all are (atleast most of us?), But why?
This year, when I look ahead, the baggage of the failures of the past suddenly seem to slow me down, more than my usual enthusiasm at taking on the challenges. I realized it just took a small slow down in life, as I paused to consider the options at a crossroad, for the failures of past to come ramming onto me. I now know that they never really left me (I just never stopped to look back), and it just takes a small pause for a small snowball to become an avalanche of all issues, and even deferred decisions to force itself to be decided upon.
Losing sight of oneself is sometimes the key to realizing who we really are, or who we aren't....
My time's up, the juggler of thoughts is back in the house - can't seem to blog more, this thought has left the building, other 'ifs', 'hows' and 'whys' juggling in my head as I try to sleep.
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